"Okay, um."
JC looked up from his lunch. "What is it, Justin?"
Justin jumped around a bit, shaking, and JC chewed on his sandwich, pulling the lettuce out because he wasn't in a lettuce mood, and it was wrecking the groove of the alfalfa sprouts. Justin sat down then stood up, then preened in the window and sat down again.
"Are you sick?" JC asked, pulling out the tomatoes, too, because they were making the bread soggy. Justin shook his head and climbed over the back of the couch, disappearing from sight as he toppled to the ground. "Are you missing your mom? She'll be back soon in a couple days." JC tore off the crust. "Are you eating all right?"
"Lance is gay!" Justin blurted out, his head appearing over the edge of the armrest and his chin resting on JC's arm. JC smiled and started to laugh, but Justin shook his head. "No, really. Lance is gay. You know that diary he has?"
"Justin, fuck," JC said, "you didn't."
Justin looked deeply apologetic. "It was open. I wasn't supposed to be back." Justin shrugged and rubbed his nose, climbing over JC to sit beside him, curling up, all lanky limbs and long, slender body. "And like, I'm cool. I'm, just. Worried, you know?"
"I understand," JC said, and he gave his sandwich to Justin, who immediately started eating because he was, after all, a growing boy, and ate constantly. "I'm going to talk to Chris, all right? And Justin, please. Don't tell Lance you read his diary."
"I won't," Justin promised, "just. Make it better."
JC nodded. He really needed to talk to Chris.
~~~
JC found Chris sitting in the bathtub, listening to music. He was fully dressed; it was his secret place he went to when he realised he was five years older than the second oldest and couldn't stand their continual teenage angst for a minute longer. Chris sighed deeply when JC sat down on the toilet.
"Justin thinks Lance is gay," JC said, his hands firmly clasped between his legs, his elbows digging into his knees. Chris crooked an eyebrow, but JC nodded firmly. "Uh, he -- probably -- read Lance's diary."
"Fucking kid!" Chris hit his forehead. "Who taught him to read?"
JC smiled. "I don't know. But. Justin seems concerned, not that Lance is gay, but because."
Chris nodded. "I get it. Thanks, C. I'll take care of it."
Chris exhaled when JC shut the door behind him, turning off his music and climbing out of the tub. His socks were wet anyway.
~~~
Joey was sleeping when Chris slipped into his room and sat down on the edge of his bed, jumping around to wake him up. All it really got Chris was a punch in the lower back, but Chris merely hopped back up after hitting the floor.
"Hey, Joe," Chris said, shaking him awake. "Lance is gay."
Joey lifted his head, his hair in messy tufts that pointed in every direction, and Chris messed them up more, hassling Joey to full consciousness. "Is he?" Joey said, blinking owlishly. "Says who? Him?" Chris shook his head. "Fuck off. I'm going back to bed."
"Justin -- accidentally -- read his diary," Chris said quietly. "So. Justin says he is."
Joey sat up and frowned. "You sure?"
Chris nodded and folded a loose corner of blanket over Joey's knee, trying to tie him into it and not able to get the knot to hold. Joey knocked his hand away, and Chris looked at him. "Justin read it, man. And it's Lance, right? So. Probably. I'd say yes."
Joey rolled his jaw. "What do you want me to do?"
"Tonight's Thursday. It's that. Thing you go to, right? That club." Chris scratched at his nose, pinching it between his fingers. "Can you bring him with you?"
"He won't go out with me," Joey said, "he doesn't go out."
Chris rolled his eyes. "And now we know why. Just tell him. I don't know. Tell him you want to try out that new restaurant. You know he loves to eat, and you love to eat. Therefore, perfectly believable. Then, get him drunk."
"He's not legal," Joey replied.
"And they probably won't care. Come on. He needs this."
"Jesus," Joey finally said, throwing his hands up in the air, and Chris smiled.
~~~
"Hey," Joey said, hanging in Lance's doorway, and Lance looked up from his homework, his blond hair spiky but controlled. Joey looked like a madman. "There's a new restaurant opening up tonight. You wanna go?"
"I have work," Lance replied, looking around like he expected Joey to be asking Justin instead and just wanted to make Justin wasn't in the room.
"You can do it tomorrow," Joey said, and damned Lance's work ethic. And Chris's stupid ideas. "Please? No one enjoys good food like you do. Chris only eats grease, and Justin eats too much, and JC eats breadsticks. Lance." Joey batted his eyelashes and felt like a moron. "Please."
Lance looked at his books and shrugged. "Um. All right, then. Yeah. When?"
Joey didn't like this thinking-on-your-toes nonsense. "I had a late lunch. Would nine be cool?"
Lance nodded. "All right. What should I wear?"
"I don't know. What you usually wear when we go out. Whatever, man. Just. Look nice, all right? I'll be back to pick you up at nine."
"Okay." Lance lifted his eyes and caught Joey's gaze. "Thank you."
Joey just smiled and left before the guilt drove him to confession.
The poor guy just didn't see anything coming, did he?
~~~
Joey was five minutes late, and Lance sat on his bed, fretting that maybe he'd been ditched. Like, Joey was sometimes forgetful, and Lance wouldn't blame him, but still. Then, Joey knocked on the door ten minutes after nine, and Lance grabbed his coat and wallet, relieved.
"Hey," Lance said casually, and Joey smiled.
"Sorry I'm late. The hair," Joey said, pointing to the slightly-more-controlled mess, and Lance nodded because he totally understood. His was thick and loved to point to the right. Lance slid by Joey and shoved his hands in his pockets.
"Are we walking?"
"It's not far," Joey replied, and they took the elevator down to the lobby. It was a really seedy hotel, but Lou was trying to get them to push their single in a couple larger cities in Germany, and Lance wasn't really going to complain. "You look good."
Lance's hand immediately went to his hair, but he smiled and shyly said, "thank you."
They walked in silence for awhile before Joey grabbed Lance by the arm and tugged him down a dark, scary alley. Lance stopped walking, terrified of being beaten up, but Joey just smiled, "hey, come on. It's fine." Joey paused. "It's a short cut."
Lance nodded and followed, and stopped again when Joey paused at a door with a neon light flashing a giant Q, immediately turning around because it wasn't like Lance didn't know certain things about the world. Lance wasn't an idiot.
"Hey," Joey said, gripping Lance by the arm. "Let's go in."
Lance looked at his shoes and shook his head, pretty sure he was going to cry. It was humiliating, this whole thing. He didn't know what Joey was doing, and he felt immensely stupid, so he just bit his lip and didn't say anything.
"Listen, Lance," Joey said, laying his hand over the back of Lance's neck. "It's all right if you're scared. I was, too, my first time out, but I was by myself. It's not so bad with someone else. Or." Joey squeezed Lance's neck. "Or we can just go back to the hotel."
"Oh." Lance sniffed and wiped at his eyes. "So you're."
"Wouldn't be here if I wasn't, man," Joey replied, and Lance looked him in the eye, trying to see if he was laughing or joking or screwing around with Lance's head, but Joey looked pretty serious. "Come on, I'll buy you a few drinks, we'll dance like fools. Just. Stick close to me, all right?"
Lance nodded and touch Joey on the arm. "Um. I am, too."
Joey smiled. "Yeah."
~~~
Lance was easy and cheap to get drunk, everyone knew it. Justin was worse, but he was under the watchful eye of his mother and usually stayed behind when they went out. Joey was keeping close patrol of Lance, who insisted on sitting at the bar and not dancing yet.
Letting Lance get used to the scene, Joey chatted for awhile with the guy who sucked his dick last Thursday, not able to recall his name but thinking it was something like David. Or Davis. Davey, maybe, or Derek. Something, Joey wasn't sure, and he was already buzzing in his head.
"I'm gonna dance with this guy --"
"Darien," the blond man supplied helpfully, and Joey grinned. That was it.
"Oh," Lance said, nodding, "all right. I'll just. Drink a lot."
Joey ruffled Lance's hair and let himself be dragged into the crowd, Darien wrapping an arm around his waist and pulling him close. Joey growled and ground into his thigh, waving his arms over his head and laughing, bumping into the guy behind him and suddenly sandwiched between two very hot blonds. Joey loved his life.
He kept an eye on Lance, who was sipping a gin and tonic, looking around with wide eyes, and he smiled sheepishly when he saw Joey looking at him, waving a bit, and Joey waved back, trying to get him to join in. Lance wouldn't budge.
"Pretty little twink," the man crushing his crotch against Joey's ass said in Joey's ear, and Joey realised he was British, which was good because speaking German was well beyond his ability. "Is he yours?"
Joey shook his head, and the man pulled back, but Joey grabbed him by the wrist. "He may not be mine," Joey said, "but leave him alone, all right?" Joey glanced at Lance, who was trying to ignore the heavily tattooed man sitting next to him. "What's your name?"
"Tom," the guy said.
"Great," Joey put Tom's hand on Darien's hip, "this is Darien, have fun."
Joey danced through the crowd and returned to Lance, who was glossy-eyed and too-happy to see Joey. "Wanna dance?" Joey asked, and Lance nodded, putting his empty glass on the counter. "Okay. Come on, man."
Getting Lance to dance sober in a club was impossible, even though Lou made them all dance like monkeys every day, but a drunk Lance couldn't stay still, though his moves were calculated and calm, poignant and sexual. At first, Lance danced a foot away, but when a tall man leaned on Lance and whispered in his ear, Joey got a whole lot of Lance pressed against him.
"Hey," Joey said, when he realised Lance seemed frantic against him, face buried in his shirt, and Joey ran his hand over Lance's back, thinking maybe taking the Mississippi boy out wasn't as good as sitting down and talking to him. Joey would have done that, but he liked to think Chris was always right.
Slowly Joey started dancing again, shaking his hips, bending his legs, and Lance looked up at him, those strange green eyes wide, but he started dancing too, just moving a bit at first as Joey put his arms over his shoulders.
"This is strange," Lance whispered, "being here. I didn't know."
"C, Chris and I agreed to keep it down low, you know? This is the only cool bar around. They're quiet, so as long as we're here, if you wanna go out, you come here." Joey leaned closer. "And don't fucking tell Lou, ever."
"Oh, I wouldn't," Lance said. "So Justin -- ?"
"Will know, someday," Joey replied, "just like you were gonna know someday."
Lance nodded. And smiled. And danced a little bit closer.
~~~
"Quiet, quiet," Lance whispered as they crept through the lobby of the hotel, Joey holding onto the back of Lance's shirt because Lance kept losing him while they walked. Lance started giggling as they approached the elevator, just couldn't stop.
"You're rumbling," Joey muttered, flopping his body on Lance's back for support. "Purring, Lance, like a big, fucking cat. Do it again," Joey demanded, but Lance really couldn't stop because it was all so funny. "Fuck. That's hot."
"Shhh," Lance hissed, laughing with tears in his eyes. "Shhh, you're straight."
"I keep forgetting," Joey said, slapping his hand over his mouth, and Lance squealed in delight, holding his sides as he stumbled forward. Joey went toppling over and landed on a potted fern, and Lance started giggling again, trying to pull him up. "Ding! Elevator!"
Lance dragged Joey inside, shaking with laughter, and Joey was all over Lance again, lying on his back to feel the vibration. The elevator was mirrored, and when Lance looked up, he met Joey's eyes in the reflection. "Hi," Lance said.
"Hi," Joey replied, licking his lips. "What you wanna do now?"
Lance touched his fingers to the mirror, pulling them over the glass and leaving smudges behind, right across Joey's face. Joey's arm tightened over Lance's chest as Joey leaned forward to press his thumb to the reflection of Lance's lips.
"I think I wanna be with you," Lance whispered, looking at his face, and when he wasn't laughing, he suddenly seemed older, more sober. He felt more sober, though his head was swimming and the world was angled. "Like, sexy with you."
Joey looked up sharply. "But you haven't before."
"No," Lance said slowly and wanted to press his cheek against the glass. It felt cool and smooth beneath his fingers. "But I have to sometime. And it could be someone else, like that guy. In the bar. Who wanted to tie me up and fuck me so hard I bled."
"Shit," Joey whispered and ran a warm hand over Lance's face, settling on his forehead. Lance stared at himself in the mirror and felt the touch, saw it and looked up at Joey, twisting his body as the doors pinged open. "Um. How about we just make out or something? And maybe sexy it up when we're sober?"
Lance thought about it then nodded. "Sounds acceptable, Fatone."
"So glad, Bass," Joey whispered, his breath hot on Lance's neck, and Lance stepped back, out of the elevator and against the wall, pulling Joey with him. The elevator hissed shut. "So you wanna kick out Justin or should I get Jayce and Chris to move?"
"Justin," Lance said, "because. He read my diary and it serves him right." Lance sniffed loudly and kissed Joey's jaw, and it felt great because Joey was getting kind of hairy, and it scratched lightly. "And that's why you knew. Right?"
"You're too smart for me, man," Joey whispered, fishing Lance's key out of his pocket and opening the door to the room. Justin looked up sleepily, his hair a mess of tangles, and Joey took him by the arm. "Come on, Jup. You're sleeping with JC and Chris tonight."
"Oh," Justin said, and Lance stepped back as Joey led him by the shoulders, soothing him quietly while Justin shuffled sleepily, pliant in his confusion. Justin smiled at Lance and patted his head. "Don't do anything on my bed, okay?"
Lance nodded. "And don't read my diary."
"Then don't leave it out," Justin said as he was being pushed out the door, and Lance grinned and sat down on his bed, fixing the pillows and taking off his coat, and his shoes, and his socks. When Joey came in, Lance smiled, and Joey crawled up the bed.
"Wanna get sexy with your lips," Joey said, licking over Lance's mouth. Lance smiled, opened, and they had their first kiss, then their second, their third. And it was sexy and hot, and Lance lay back, letting Joey loom over him and squeaking suddenly, arching his back.
"What?" Joey asked, breathless.
Lance reached under his back and pulled out the diary. "Just this."
Joey kissed it then tossed it onto Justin's bed and kissed Lance again.
Fin.
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